Take up all the space you want

Antics, ,

The novel that I’m working on now explores what it means to be in a girl’s body in this world at this time. It’s about control and consent and physicality and wildness. It is also about space. How do we claim it? Fill it? Own it?

Yesterday at the dog park, I had a really upsetting interaction with a woman. Her dog took my dog’s ball, and the woman simply shrugged. “He’s a ball stealer,” she said. “Sorry. I can’t get it back from him.”

What followed (and I’ll spare you the details) was my utter disbelief in her behavior as well as my desire to get my $5 Chuck-It ball back. She ended up swearing at me and yelling at me and saying I was stupid to have an expensive ball for my dog and expecting it back and a whole lot of horrible things. Including telling me that she walked in the park every day and hoped she would never see me again.

Talk about claiming space (and balls that don’t belong to you.)

I walked home shaken (I am not a lover of conflict). She ended up driving up next to me in her truck and holding out the ball. “Here!” she snapped. Apparently her dog gives them back when he gets in the car. I took the ball and continued home.

But the damage was done. I too walk in that park nearly every day. I make two loops and throw the ball for Gilda so she can get good and worn out so that I can write. I use that space daily, and yet my first inclination was to find another place to walk. As I said, I am not a lover of conflict.

How many times has this happened to you? When have you been pushed out of space, emotional or physical, that you have every right to occupy? How many times? I could give you a long list, and I am tired of it.

I’m not saying that we should all turn into narcissistic Trump twins who think that the world was made for us and us alone, but we do not need to shrink. We do not need to cede territory.

So today, when Gilda brings me her ball and tells me it is time to go, we go to the dog park, our park. And if that woman is there, then okay. I can take it. I can even find some empathy for her. It must suck to have your dog be a dick.

It’s a small act of rebellion but I deserve it.

And so does Gilda.

Share

It’s time to talk about sex and virginity and voice

Writing, , , ,

Recently you may have noticed a plethora of posts from me that feature a beautiful book with a canoe on it…

I know, I know!

I’ve been talking a lot about THE WAY BACK FROM BROKEN. It’s not every day I get to publish a novel, especially one that is drawn from such a personal and painful place. It’s been humbling and inspiring and amazing to share the book and to hear from readers, and you’ve all been very indulgent of my shameless self-promotion. Thank you!

However, if you are tired of hearing about leeches and portages, you might be excited to know that change is coming…

BIG CHANGE…

Drumroll, please…VW_front

I have a new book coming out on February 2nd and it has nothing to do with canoeing or grief (well, maybe a bit of grief).

THE V-WORD is an anthology of personal essays by women about first-time sexual experiences. The women who have written for this collection are smart and funny and insightful and phenomenally honest. I can not wait to share their stories with you.

silenced terror large
Talking honestly about sex is the best way to help young women find and use their voices in intimate encounters.

Our goal in laying it all out there is to give teens a broad perspective on what real sex is like—sometimes awesome, sometimes not so much. The landscape of sexual experiences is broad, and we hope our experiences will help young women to chart their own course and claim their own sexual agency. After all, they are the ones who should be in charge of this journey.

So you can expect to hear me blabbing for awhile about THE V-WORD. I hope you’ll help me get this book into the hands of readers who need it.  Thank you, my friends!

 

Share

A #Readdukah Realization

My Reads, Navel Gazing, , ,

I was planning on posting a Jewish book a day for all of Chanukkah as part of the #Readdukah celebration of Jewish themed books. You may have noticed that I flamed out after six. Mostly that was because days seven and eight fell on the weekend and I was busy having fun with my family, but also I realized that I have not read nearly enough Jewish children’s books!

So in lieu of days seven and eight, I’m adding an addendum to a New Year’s Resolution (look at how prompt I am with that!). My plan in the next year is to focus on reading books by and about marginalized voices. In addition to my list of books by authors of color, I plan to add more Jewish authors and also Muslim authors.

I firmly believe that books can bring us together across vast differences, and our world needs this more than ever right now. Let me leave you with a quote that I have returned to again and again for solace and encouragement. (I wish I knew who wrote it, but it has been attributed to multiple sources.)

I love these words because they remind me that our task really is a simple one:

Make gentle.

Find compassion.

Screen Shot 2015-12-14 at 8.22.38 PM

 

Share

The Barefoot Book of Jewish Tales – Day Six #Readukkah Challenge

My Reads, , ,
This year I’m participating in the 2015 #Readukkah Challenge hosted by the Association of Jewish Libraries. The goal is to spread the word about wonderful Jewish books during the eight days of Hanukkah. So here they are: eight days of good reads on Jewish themes. Enjoy!
DAY SIX #READUKKAH CHALLENGE:
THE BAREFOOT BOOK OF JEWISH TALES
By Shoshana Boyd Gelfand

barefoot

About this book:

This engaging collection includes eight delightful tales from the Jewish tradition. Each story has been chosen for its appeal to families and each has a simple — yet powerful — message. Written by Rabbi Shoshana Boyd Gelfand, herself a mother of three, this is a fantastic set of stories to share and to treasure. Includes two story CDs narrated by Debra Messing.

Why I think you should read it:

I love all of the titles in the Barefoot Books line up. Our family has most of them (Princesses, Knights, Pirates, Horses, Animals, Grandmothers, and of course Jewish Tales). We love to listen to them in the car. Perfect for those trips around town. The readers are always great and the stories are fascinating.

Happy Hanukkah

hanukkah_candles_sm

Share

With a Mighty Hand – Day Five #Readukkah Challenge

My Reads, , ,
This year I’m participating in the 2015 #Readukkah Challenge hosted by the Association of Jewish Libraries. The goal is to spread the word about wonderful Jewish books during the eight days of Hanukkah. So here they are: eight days of good reads on Jewish themes. Enjoy!
DAY FIVE #READUKKAH CHALLENGE:
WITH A MIGHTY HAND
Adapted by Amy Ehrlich

Mighty Hand
About this book:

Amy Ehrlich retains the beauty, drama, and mystery of the Torah in this unique adaptation, gorgeously illustrated with paintings by Daniel Nevins. The Torah is the first five books of the Hebrew Bible, which Christians call the Old Testament. It tells the story of the beginning of the Jewish people and their relationship with God. From Adam and Eve to the first patriarch, Abraham, to Moses, who led his people to the promised land, the stories in the Torah have been studied and revered since it was first written down nearly 3,000 years ago. Now in this glorious volume, Amy Ehrlich crafts an authentic, lyrical adaptation that is presented as a continuous narrative, one that honors the complexities of the original text. Daniel Nevins’s richly hued paintings bring the ancient wonders of the Torah to resonant life, making this truly a gift to savor, share, and treasure.

Why I think you should read it:

This is not your typical “children’s bible.” It does not attempt to simplify the stories of the Torah into easily-digested moral parables. Instead it captures all the thought-provoking, weirdness of the Torah in a way that leads to excellent family conversations.

Happy Hanukkah

hanukkah_candles_sm

Share

Number the Stars – Day Four #Readukkah Challenge

My Reads, , ,
This year I’m participating in the 2015 #Readukkah Challenge hosted by the Association of Jewish Libraries. The goal is to spread the word about wonderful Jewish books during the eight days of Hanukkah. So here they are: eight days of good reads on Jewish themes. Enjoy!
DAY FOUR #READUKKAH CHALLENGE:
NUMBER THE STARS
by Lois Lowry

Number
About this book:

As the German troops begin their campaign to “relocate” all the Jews of Denmark, Annemarie Johansen’s family takes in Annemarie’s best friend, Ellen Rosen, and conceals her as part of the family. Through the eyes of ten-year-old Annemarie, we watch as the Danish Resistance smuggles almost the entire Jewish population of Denmark, nearly seven thousand people, across the sea to Sweden. The heroism of an entire nation reminds us that there was pride and human decency in the world even during a time of terror and war.

Why I think you should read it:

History is powerful–if we remember, if we pay attention, if we act. The time to act against the intolerance, ignorance, and demonization that lead to genocide is now. Read this book to remember how people can reach across different faiths and love each other. Read this book to remember that we must speak out against the anti-Muslim sentiments sweeping this country. Please…

Happy Hanukkah

hanukkah_candles_sm

Share

The Wednesday Wars – Day Three #Readukkah Challenge

My Reads, , ,
This year I’m participating in the 2015 #Readukkah Challenge hosted by the Association of Jewish Libraries. The goal is to spread the word about wonderful Jewish books during the eight days of Hanukkah. So here they are: eight days of good reads on Jewish themes. Enjoy!
DAY THREE #READUKKAH CHALLENGE:
THE WEDNESDAY WARS
by Gary Schmidt

 

WednesdayAbout this book:

Meet Holling Hoodhood, a seventh-grader at Camillo Junior High, who must spend Wednesday afternoons with his teacher, Mrs. Baker, while the rest of the class has religious instruction. Mrs. Baker doesn’t like Hollinghe’s sure of it. Why else would she make him read the plays of William Shakespeare outside class? But everyone has bigger things to worry about, like Vietnam. His father wants Holling and his sister to be on their best behavior: the success of his business depends on it. But how can Holling stay out of trouble when he has so much to contend with? A bully demanding cream puffs; angry rats; and a baseball hero signing autographs the very same night Holling has to appear in a play in yellow tights! As fate sneaks up on him again and again, Holling finds Motivationthe Big Min the most unexpected places and musters up the courage to embrace his destiny, in spite of himself.

Why I think you should read it:

This is not a specifically Jewish book, but there is a wonderful subplot that involves a bar mitzvah. The scene in which Holling Hoodhood’s friend Danny is called to the Torah is a fabulous, warm depiction of what happens during this important ceremony. My kids were so excited to see this part of their lives portrayed in a book. (My son’s bar mitzvah was in February. My daughter’s bat mitzvah is coming up.)

Happy Hanukkah

hanukkah_candles_sm

Share

Hereville – Day Two #Readukkah Challenge

My Reads, , , ,
This year I’m participating in the 2015 #Readukkah Challenge hosted by the Association of Jewish Libraries. The goal is to spread the word about wonderful Jewish books during the eight days of Hanukkah. So here they are: eight days of good reads on Jewish themes. Enjoy!
DAY TWO #READUKKAH CHALLENGE:
HEREVILLE
by Barry Deutsch

Hereville

About this book:

Welcome to Hereville, home of the first-ever wisecracking, adventure-loving, sword-wielding Orthodox Jewish heroine. A delightful mix of fantasy, adventure, cultural traditions, and preteen commotion, this fun, quirky graphic novel series will captivate middle-school readers with its exciting visuals and entertaining new heroine.Spunky, strong-willed eleven-year-old Mirka Herschberg isn’t interested in knitting lessons from her stepmother, or how-to-find-a-husband advice from her sister, or you-better-not warnings from her brother. There’s only one thing she “does” want: to fight dragons!Granted, no dragons have been breathing fire around Hereville, the Orthodox Jewish community where Mirka lives, but that doesn’t stop the plucky girl from honing her skills. She fearlessly stands up to local bullies. She battles a very large, very menacing pig. And she boldly accepts a challenge from a mysterious witch, a challenge that could bring Mirka her heart’s desire: a dragon-slaying sword! All she has to do is find–and outwit–the giant troll who’s got it!

Why I think you should read it:

It captures a slice of Jewish life that is rarely depicted in so-called Jewish books. Mirka is a fun and funny heroine. Barry Deutsch is a master of the graphic novel format. This book wins in all ways!

*You will love this book and will want more. You are in luck since Barry has written two more books in the Hereville Series!

Happy Hanukkah

hanukkah_candles_sm

Share